Breaking Through Resistance: A 5-Step Framework

Dr. Christine Li [00:00:00]:
Welcome back to the Make Time for Success podcast. This is episode number two nineteen. If you are currently feeling like you're resisting something, whether it's decluttering or getting something off your to do list or doing something super important. If that is you, this episode is for you. I have been using a simple five step framework for years in my own life and as I help my clients, I use this framework to teach them as well. It is a combination of just knowing what you're being faced with, what you are feeling blocked by, and exploring what are the different ways you can shift your mindset and get yourself into action so that you can actually get the thing done and start reflecting and celebrating about your results after you've taken action. It's really quite simple. It's really, really effective and I invite you to listen to the episode, implement the steps in your own life today, and then let me know how we can celebrate.

Dr. Christine Li [00:01:11]:
It's gonna be great. Let's go listen to this episode together now. Hi. I'm Dr Christine Li and I'm a psychologist and a procrastination coach. I've helped thousands of people move past procrastination and overwhelm so they could begin working to their potential. In this podcast, you're going to learn powerful strategies for getting your mind, body, and energy to work together so that you can focus on what's really important and accomplish the goals you want to achieve. When you start living within your full power, you're going to see how being productive can be easy and how you can create success on demand. Welcome to the Make Time for Success podcast.

Dr. Christine Li [00:02:03]:
Today, I would love to share a simple but really powerful step by step process and framework for breaking through your resistance. Today, I'm gonna use the example of the topic of resistance to decluttering just so that you can envision what breaking through resistance can really feel and look like. And this was all inspired by an actual live decluttering session that I hosted this morning with a few of my clients from my Simply Productive program. Simply Productive is a group coaching experience that I host, and I love doing this. I gather people together to learn the basic, most fundamental principles of high productivity and living well. And of course, I think learning how to break through resistance is a really key piece of knowing how to live well and knowing how to get things done. So I'm gonna teach you this approach today, the same one that I used this morning in that coaching session. You're gonna see how this works.

Dr. Christine Li [00:03:11]:
So let's dive in. The first step that everyone needs to do is pretty simple. You just wanna identify the area that you actually want to tackle or handle. This is probably the area that you've been fighting. You've been feeling stuck in. You've been feeling like you wanna avoid this area rather than move towards that area. So this is what I would love for you to identify as the focus for this de resistance framework activity or experience. So what is coming up for you? What is coming to mind? The reason why I ask those questions is that this should not be difficult for you to answer.

Dr. Christine Li [00:03:57]:
Make it easy for yourself. Pick just one space. If you're decluttering, Pick one category if you're feeling like you're overwhelmed with all these to do list items. Or just pick one task that seems to be calling for your energy. It is okay. We will not be judging because we don't know what you're doing. So pick for yourself. Pick something that makes sense.

Dr. Christine Li [00:04:21]:
The members that I worked with this morning, they picked a very wide variety of areas in their homes to declutter. They were talking about kitchen counters. They were talking about different art spaces. They were talking about corners of different rooms. So, again, there's no judgment. There's no need for judgment because we're just trying to get things done. So make this simple. Make it limited.

Dr. Christine Li [00:04:44]:
We don't wanna pick something that's gigantic and overwhelming just because you're thinking about it. So make it focused, realistic, and something that comes to mind. And that's all there is for step one, identifying the area that you want to handle. Step two is where the meat is. Right? Step two is identify your resistance. So before we do anything, we really want to observe what is happening with us. We wanna observe what is feeling like a roadblock in our way. What is blocking us from taking action? What is blocking us from choosing stagnation over process and progress? And when I interviewed my clients today, they gave, again, a range of responses.

Dr. Christine Li [00:05:33]:
But the themes that came up are probably themes that you are familiar with. Themes of I don't have enough time or I feel like time is lacking. I I don't have enough energy or I'm feeling too lazy. And the third big category was just plain being overwhelmed. Overwhelm for me is the state of feeling like there's just too much to handle, and then the ego shuts down and decides I'm not going to cooperate with any behavior moving forward. So if those areas seem familiar to you, keep listening because we're going to learn how to break through the resistance of feeling like you have no time, you have no energy, and you're completely overwhelmed, which is going to be fantastic. Alright. Step three is to shift away from the resistance and flip it.

Dr. Christine Li [00:06:25]:
You want to instead of sinking and drowning in resistance and overwhelm, you want to decide not that's not for me. I'm going to envision myself already being successful with my desired outcome. So that is step three. Envision your desired outcome. This may need a little bit of imagination for you, but sometimes maybe it's just a quick you already know what your vision is. It may be the clean kitchen counter. It might be the report handed in on time with all the details that you needed to include in the report already polished off. Whatever it is, I want you to have a vision of that, and I want you to feel what you will be feeling when that is all said and done, when there's no more resistance, when there's only a feeling of success.

Dr. Christine Li [00:07:18]:
What is that going to look like and what is that going to feel like? What feelings are you going to have? And my members also participated in doing this envisioning exercise, and the comments were really flowing in the chat there. And they were saying things like, I'm going to feel free. I'm going to feel accomplished. I'm going to feel energized. And then I noted to my members that these words that were coming out for step three, envisioning the outcome, were really statements of what they valued as individuals. So when you think about it, if you say, I wanna clean this kitchen because I wanna be able to cook really healthy meals and feel like I'm clean, then your values are efficiency and clarity or cleanliness. And it makes sense, right? What we wish for are the values that we are aiming to live with and to live through. So step three is really important because step three, that outcome, that desired outcome is often the thing that we are not focusing on enough.

Dr. Christine Li [00:08:36]:
We're focusing on step two, the resistance. We're drowning in resistance while our bright future and that feeling of being in our values and in our efficiency and in our clarity and in our best power are just kind of they're just more fantasies and we're not paying attention to those. So let's stick with the fantasy of winning. Let's stick with the desire of I'm doing this. I'm succeeding. I'm gonna feel free just as soon as I finish, if not before, because I've broken through my resistance. When you think about it, anytime you break through your resistance, that's freedom. You don't even have to finish.

Dr. Christine Li [00:09:16]:
You just have to break through your resistance. Okay. Step four, this is the meat and potatoes of the system because you're gonna start taking action and without action, I think it's hard to feel real progress. It's hard to feel real accomplishments. So I really suggest you continue through step four. Make sure you decide and make possible you're taking action. Now that you're clear on what you're going to tackle, which was step one, you're also clear on what's stopping you, which is step two, and you're also clear on what success is gonna look and feel like, which is step three. It is time to take action.

Dr. Christine Li [00:10:01]:
Even just starting a little teeny bit of your goal will help to create momentum and momentum creates more momentum. And you know what also adds to your momentum? Doing your taking action in the midst of company. Having other people, having a community, having friends, having strangers, doing the same type of activity that you are doing is game changing. When you work alongside other people, whether in person or on a Zoom call, you're going to feel more responsible to the task. You're gonna feel more like staying accountable to what you say. You're gonna feel more motivated and energized, and you're gonna feel like this is actually not as bad as I've been making it out to be, which is always helpful. It's like, I don't know, eating a sweet treat or something. You feel like, wow, this this kind of high feeling.

Dr. Christine Li [00:10:59]:
And, you know, it's fun to take action and to celebrate it with friends too. That is actually part of step five of the framework. You want to get together after taking action, reconvene with your friends or your community, and then you want to really reflect on what happened. You wanna reflect and say, how do I feel? On a scale of zero to 10, how was that? Typically, you're gonna be rating yourself at a high, like a seven to a 10, which is lovely. And you're going to feel, wow, why did I not do that earlier? Wow. That was a lot easier than I expected. Wow. I'm so glad this worked.

Dr. Christine Li [00:11:41]:
I can't wait to do a half an hour more of this. This wasn't enough time for me to really fulfill all the good mood that is in this decluttering task. So reflect on what has happened. Rate your success level and your joy level. Note how you're feeling. Likely you're going to be feeling more in tune and aligned with the values that you care about. Those values of freedom, excitement, being energized and feeling accomplished. And then the other part of step five is you want to plan for your next steps.

Dr. Christine Li [00:12:17]:
How can you continue with this? How can you carry the energy that you've created, the momentum that you have forward? How can you make this continue? Because this is such a good vibe and I just love that this framework is simple and effective. I love to share these kinds of things with my clients and my audience, and I'm so grateful I got to share this with you today. It is really simple, right? Five steps simple. Know where you're at. Know what's stopping you. Be really honest with yourself when you're doing this process. Know what you really want and value that at the highest level. Then start taking action.

Dr. Christine Li [00:13:01]:
Then start celebrating with yourself, celebrating with your space, celebrating with your shortened to do list and celebrating with your friends and your community. This is a very positive, very fulfilling, very effective process. So I suggest that you take this process and go implement it in your space today, whether it be a to do list item or a decluttering session. Go take some sort of quick action today and then let me know what happened. You can always direct message me over on Instagram, and that is Instagram at procrastination coach is my account. Again, it's at procrastination coach. And I also invite you to if you feel really inspired by today's episode, I invite you to join me for a live training. I'm gonna be doing a free five day challenge called reenergize your home.

Dr. Christine Li [00:14:00]:
It is a decluttering challenge. It will be the eighth time that I'm running this live event. And, you know, I think it's going to be the best one yet because typically every time that I run one, it gets better. The energy is more alive, and the decluttering that happens over the course of five days is nothing short of miraculous. People clean and clear out and resolve entire rooms of clutter, and they make their rooms go from kind of messy and filled with stuff to open, clear, clean and usable and magazine worthy sometimes. So I invite you to come see what this is all about and all you need to do to register for this free, fun event is to go to maketimeforsuccesspodcast.com/spring2025. Again, it's maketimeforsuccesspodcast.com/spring2025. So the numbers 2025 And the link to join will also be in the show notes that accompany this episode.

Dr. Christine Li [00:15:12]:
Thanks so much for listening to another episode of the Make Time for Success podcast. I can't wait to continue with you next week. Have a good one. Bye. Thank you for listening to this episode of the Make Time for Success podcast. If you enjoyed what you've heard, you can subscribe to make sure you get notified of upcoming episodes. You can also visit our website, maketimeforsuccesspodcast.com, for past episodes, show notes, and all the resources we mentioned on the show. Feel free to connect with me over on Instagram too.

Dr. Christine Li [00:15:45]:
You can find me there under the name procrastination coach. Send me a DM and let me know what your thoughts are about the episodes you've been listening to, and let me know any topics that you might like me to talk about on the show. I'd love to hear all about how you're making time for success. Talk to you soon.