Discover Your Spark and Fulfillment in the Second Chapter of Life with Laurie Wright

Christine Li  0:01  
Welcome back to the Make Time for Success podcast. This is episode 85. There are just so many negative stereotypes and expectations about what is involved in the aging process, especially for women. I think my guest today Laurie Wright is here to describe how she found how to live in true alignment personally and professionally. Later in her life. At age 63. She is as vibrant as any 20 year old I know. And in this episode, she describes the many techniques she shares with her students to help them find their way to real happiness and alignment, too. Laurie Wright is known as Not Your Average Grandma, and she is the founder of The Second Half Spark School. And she's the host of the Not Your Average Lives podcast. Her mission is to help empty nesters who might wake up most days feeling unmotivated, unexcited, and without clarity about what's next, to discover the spark they so desire, so that they can live the rest of their life being who they are meant to be, and doing what brings them a deep sense of fulfillment. Let's go listen to this fun and inspiring conversation now.

Hi, I'm Dr. Christine Li, and I'm a psychologist and a procrastination coach. I've helped 1000s of people move past procrastination and overwhelm so they can begin working to their potential. In this podcast, you're going to learn a powerful strategies for getting your mind, body and energy to work together so that you can focus on what's really important and accomplish the goals you want to achieve. When you start living within your full power, you're going to see how being productive can be easy, and how you can create success on demand. Welcome to the Make Time for Success podcast. 

Hi, everyone. Welcome to the show. I am sitting here on video with Laurie Wright, our special guest for today's show. She is not your average grandma that is trademarked for her. And she indeed is not your average woman. And she's also the host of the Not Your Average Lives Podcast. I'm looking forward to today's conversation with Laurie, thank you so much for being here.

Laurie Wright  2:31  
Thanks for having me. I'm so excited to chat.

Christine Li  2:34  
Yes, we are going to chat about a lot of different topics. And I'm wondering if you could start us off by describing who you are how you became to be than not your average grandma.

Laurie Wright  2:48  
Go? Sure. So it's kind of a funny story. I was a beachbody coach. And I was kind of an unwilling Beachbody coach. So if you not familiar with Beachbody, it's a network marketing company and my daughter became a coach. And she asked me and I needed to lose weight. And she said, Will you be in one of my her first challenge group? So I said, okay, sure, honey, what? Give me the link, I'll sign up, right. And so I got this program, and back then we still didn't have online programs that much to work out. This is like seven years ago. So I was 55 I'm 63 now. So yeah, I needed to lose probably 10-15 pounds, you know, to crept up, and I just had the most amazing experience with that online group. And it just charged me up and made me feel like I wasn't 55 it made me feel like I was like back in my 20s In fact, I got in such great shape that I was in better shape than when I was in college. I say because I was I was fit I did my first ever pull up. I was like I couldn't do it wasn't even a goal. And so I started as a as a joke doing hashtag not your average grandma. Just because I was like thought it was funny. You know, I was like haha, you know, you look at my grandma guns, you know what I pulled up my it really started as a joke. And and then it just, I am because my daughter. Well put it this way. She kind of talked me into being a coach because I got a discount. And I thought it was really sketchy. And I said stop it go away. But then after like another couple of months, I was like, Oh my gosh, I want other people to feel like I feel I want to help other people. And that was really the first foray into being a coach because I really didn't need any certification. I just could help people with my experience. And so it became a part time gig and so I created the business page and got my not your average grandma page going and so I'm on Facebook is not your average grandma and then I went Instagram I realized I need to be on Instagram. I created a not your average grandma account over there and so though, I just learned through that, how to have an online business how to show up online. I mean, I remember doing my first video, like live video. And I was like, you know, because because we come from the era where we had those cassette recorders, and hearing our voices, like now I think about my grandkids, and they're never gonna think their voice is weird, because they like heard it on videos, right? Yeah. But I was like, oh, that's like, my voice is terrible. And all that I went through all that. So that's really how not your average grandma came to be. And then I did Beachbody for about four and a half years. But it was so interesting, because I had come from the corporate world. And I worked for AOL for 13 years. So that was my kind of longest gig. And I rose to the ranks of executive, I was a vice president there. But I never really saw myself as smart enough to have my own business. It was always like those other people there. I never felt. It's funny. We grew very fast at AOL. And I was very good at what I did. But you know, it was just I had I had great bosses, I had great opportunities, I was in the right place at the right time. And I moved up the corporate ladder quite easily and quite quickly. And so when I got there, at like, a vice president, I was like, Oh, my gosh, I didn't feel like I belonged. And so I, I have a lot of impostor syndrome with that. And I would look at these business suit, guys, because that's honestly what's at the conference room table. And that that kind of mid 90s These like Harvard business school grads, Stanford, you know, you know, Wharton, and, and I didn't finish college,

I quit, because I couldn't find what I like to do. And so I just kind of fell into a job. And I just started liking what I did, and, and doing it. So. So I never thought of myself, I thought I wasn't creative enough. And I thought I wasn't smart enough. And so, Beachbody was really something that filled me up so much. And I loved it so much. But I didn't like the network marketing, kind of, you know, model, I didn't like the model. And I was like, wait a minute, I do all this work. And I get all these prizes. But I'm not making the six figure income that I was making. And they're getting, like 75% of what you know, I was like, this is like this, we say we have our own business, but we really don't have our own business. And so I would go to these conferences. And I, I remember specifically going to a conference with Chalene Johnson and Chalene Johnson, although she was she had fitness programs on Beachbody, she was also very business minded. And she had a program was my first online course that I paid a lot of money for, that made me nauseous to sign up for. But that was my first real understanding of what I could do with an online business. And I went to her conference in person in LA. And I had this idea at it. And it was like, I want to do an online course. Now at the time, I was still a beachbody coach. But I had this desire to create something. And it was like really a little bit of a mindset course, because what I found with the people I helped, they would lose weight. And they would be good to go for a year or so. And then it would all go back to where it was. Because, you know, it's like I help people on the outside. But they needed to transform from the inside out. Right. And so, yeah, so that really frustrated me. Plus, I was like, Oh my gosh, I want to do a course I want to do and you know, I really want to do that. And that's when you know, we have a mutual Coach James Wedmore. And that's when I heard about him. And I started following his podcast, and he has this program that teaches you really how to create a business and a lot of mindset work to go with it. Because being as you know, a business owner requires that you are constantly in the world of personal development and growing. So yeah, so that is kind of long story about how I got into how not your average grandma came to be and how I kind of got into the online business world.

Christine Li  9:06  
Okay, thank you for sharing that. And I'm glad you found that it sounded like you follow your intuition. And you followed what lit you up and got you excited. And it's unfortunate that you felt the imposter syndrome. In the corporate space. Even though you showed your talent, you showed that you were competitive and able, I'm assuming you had to leave the corporate job. What was the situation around that? And what kind of difficulty might you have had in that decision?

Laurie Wright  9:36  
Yes. So in the whole process, I you know, I left AOL in like 2005 I guess so. I didn't start an online business world to like 2015. So I 10 years. They're kind of like making my way. And what I will say about I think the whole imposter syndrome and not feeling like I fit had a lot to do with me not being aligned with really my true purpose. Like really why am I here? What does it I really love to do? Now, in my lead up to being a vice president, I was a project manager and I would have these huge teams that we would like launch some big project software development project. And I loved that camaraderie. I loved having a shared goal. I loved working with the like more problem children on the project. And to me looking back, you know, there's a parallel coaching, that's a project manager really has to coach people. And so the more I moved up the corporate ladder, the less happy I became. And so, so through that 10 year process, I ended up getting a divorce and reconnecting with my old boyfriend, my college sweetheart, which is a whole nother story. If we don't talk about procrastination, like, that is something that I in hindsight, I'm glad I did it when I did, my kids were grown when we divorced. But this person I married to now, we were connected, like, long, long time ago, and he would come up in my mind periodically throughout my life. And finally, one day, I had a little too much to drink at a wedding, and I decided to Google him. So that was gonna help. I stopped procrastinating. But I did have a little wine to help me do that. So yeah, so there was this big 10 year gap. And then, you know, and I, but I always liked personal development, self development. So I think that's one of the reasons that I was attracted to network marketing, because, you know, my daughter would send me these videos, and I'd be like, Oh, that's kind of neat. And so I loved Oprah. I mean, I was a huge Oprah fan. And so that was kind of like, I remember she did back in like, 2008 ish. It was around the time I was going through my divorce. She and Eckhart Tolle did a webinar on his new book at the time, which was, oh, gosh, the new world or something like that. And maybe something like that. It was what? Maybe the New Earth something the New Earth? Yes, yes. Because it was after the power of now. And so that was before really, webinars were a thing. And we got for 10. Mondays on Monday night, we got on a call. And it was I loved it. And it was kind of go through each chapter. And each Monday night was a chapter and then Oprah and Eckhart would share, you know, how Oprah would always, you know, dog tag, or doggy or page or whatever the pages and then her perspective, her what she got out of a chapter and then like Eckert was so like, oh, my gosh, such a interesting person, that his whole backstory. And so you know, it's always something in the secret came out around them. And I was always very interested in that. So what I will say, from my experience, to your listeners, is when something is really interesting to you, when something really resonates, and something really intrigues you, follow it, pursue it, be more curious about it, learn more about it, because for me, I would dabble and then something I would like, and then I'd move on, you know, it's like, oh, I have to be the breadwinner, I have to make this money, I have to get a new high paying job. When literally, I mean, I remember getting new jobs and like not being happy about them, you know, being happy Oh, yeah, I'm gonna make a lot of money, but not happy about like how it was going to fulfill me. And so ultimately, I left while I was working as a beachbody coach. I quit my job that I wasn't really happy. And but then I went back to the corporate world for a couple more years. And then once I got going with my now online business, is when I said for good done, this is it. I'm going all in and trusting the universe, because I know that if I'm this excited about it, and this lit up about it, and I'm really actually helping people and I had gotten a certified. I'd gotten certified in neuro coaching and I've had since gotten another certification. So it was really part time building my what was to give me the kind of the confidence and and what I felt like I needed to help people on a deeper level. And so yeah, so that's kind of I have been not working just so happened right before the pandemic is when I quit. Yes, yeah.

Christine Li  14:14  
So I am imagining that you're currently helping the women who follow you and who are in your tribe, to take those chances and to follow those nudges towards what they feel is really more aligned with them. Could you share with us your technique and some stories about what people have gone through what you've seen people through?

Laurie Wright  14:39  
Yeah, yeah, that's a great, thank you for the opportunity to talk about that because I've had some pretty significant transformations. And it has been so I just posted in my my student community today, one of the people that have just recently come through, she just had signed up in our February cohort, and within three weeks She had incredible transformation. But it's really kind of believing, you know, getting that so much of the stuff that we learn about, like our limiting beliefs, like I say we learn about you and I have learned about this as our, you know, through our business mentorship. But so much of it is an unknown, I think, especially for the age that I deal with. So they don't know that they're operating with these beliefs that are not serving them that are limiting them. And once we uncover that, and really see it for what it is and where it comes from, it's like, so freeing, so freeing, and what I found is so many of my students, they are operating in a role, if you will, or an identity that is based on something that they think they should be something that for whatever reason, over the years, they thought I'll be accepted, if I am this kind of person, if I operate with this identity, when in fact that is so out of alignment with who they came here to be. So I've learned a lot about and I feel I'm not a religious person, but I'd become very spiritual through this whole process. My parents were atheists. So I really, I mean, when I was very, very small, we went to church, but it was only because I was baptized. But it was only because my grandparents, you know, it's kind of like, they wanted my parents to do that. And then they kind of my, my, and one of my aunt was like, crazy, crazy Jesus freak. And so she like turned the whole family, you know, against religion, honestly. And so I had this whole upbringing of like, anti church, anti God, in a sense, but I had my own, I always felt like there was a God, you know, it's like, kind of my own little thing. And then I dated a Mormon in high school. So I went to church with him. Every Sunday, so crazy. But anyways, yeah, so I say Oprah, it was kind of my spiritual teacher, because I learned so much from her. And I really got into the whole, like, the universal laws, and you know, the mystique, that there's this higher power, and we have this agreement, and that we came here with this agreement to be somebody and do something. And so many people get into this human body, and they think, Oh, my gosh, my parents want me to do this. You know, the reason why I got into the job that I got into is because one thing my mother said to me, and I remember is, I wanted to be a social worker. And there is a relation ship to what you do as a coach and kind of a social worker. And so that was coming from a deeper place in me. And she said to me, you will never make money doing that. She was a schoolteacher. So I don't know what it was with her about money, you know, because she money, but yeah, and so that stuck with me. And every time I went to go, like apply for a job was like, has to be about money asked me about money. And my first husband was a police officer. So I had to, you know, that limited income there. And so I had to really, you know, we were always to income, you know, kids raising kids kind of thing. And so, you know, over time, and, you know, in the private sector, the sky's the limit, right? And so, so I was always after that financial goal, and never really filled up. What really, I came here to do, honestly. So I was a little late to the game, because I mean, honestly, I didn't even start my online business. It was like, right before I turned 60, I was like, the month before I turned 60. Yeah, well,

Christine Li  18:39  
we're so glad. I think I'm so glad that you did do that pivot for yourself. You are beaming, and you are so filled with purpose and excitement, for the work that you do. And I'm sure the tribe that you have is on fire, as well. I have a question about the internal resistance that we have. I mean, there are the limiting beliefs that other people might have put onto us or taught us or society's standards about money being the the big goal or the only goal that really matters. And yet, I'm also thinking about when we're making a big decision to maybe leave something that we've found to be familiar and supplies us with what we need, basically, that there is some sort of internal resistance to just changing and what do you say to your clients and students, when they're just at that point where everything seems good for the shift, but there's that piece that remains of just like, well, let's just not try that. Let's just stay safe. Let's just stay in our comfort zone.

Laurie Wright  19:51  
Yeah, well, we do a lot of work to understand what it is that they value. And so a lot of those people, they value being said If you know they value security because of something that's probably happened to them in the past, we dig deep on that. And so, yeah, and it's honestly, it's just like, Okay, where are you? Are you happy. And if you choose to not go there, then you're choosing to stay where you are. So that's a big part of it, you know, and there's the fear of

such a funny thing. But you know, it happens to me, it happens to everybody. But the what ifs, right, it's always the worst case scenario. So, you know, I was talking to a student recently, and she's like, well, I'm worried my husband know that, like, people will not accept the change, people will, for whatever negative reason that somebody can think of to avoid the change. That's what they believe will happen. So you always ask, well, what if that didn't happen? What if that's just something you conjured up in your imagination, and it's just like, you know, we we do a lot of work about what ego is versus what the soul you know, and how to connect with that, you know, a lot of my students haven't heard that stuff before. And so they're like, What is this? They're so disconnected, I was very disconnected. Yeah, it was a busy doer, I caught myself and I, I was I took pride on being in Taipei, I took pride in the fact that, oh, I can't sit down, I am too busy. But like, what happened is, that was the connection to that voice, that it's like I was playing Whack a Mole with that voice. It was like, no, no, no, go away, go away, go away, because you're going to disrupt my life. And I'm gonna have to make some changes that I don't want to. And it's very scary. So yeah, so we do a lot of that one of my you asked my framework, so I do have a framework that so I have the second half SPARC school, is what I call it, because for mostly women over 50, I have women in their 70s that come through the program. And it's so great to see that somebody is still willing to change and still has the hope of like, living it, you know, and it's what I love about it is it's and what they realize we're not it's not a destination, it's a journey, right? And so just whatever you have left, let's make it the best journey possible. And so yeah, so what what we go through is a lot of people don't have a vision. So Spark is see, so yeah, see where you want to go? And so what's that vision? P plan, so you got to plan it, I have my own system for planning, it's super, super simple, because some of the planners I've had are quite overwhelming, right? Keep it down, right. And I'm a project manager in the background. So I'm like, hey, maybe that part of my life was for a reason, right? And then A is is really about aligned action, because you can take action all day long. But if it's the wrong action, then it's going to be like totally the wrong thing for you to do. And that's what happens, a lot of us have to do lists that are based on something that is doesn't excite us, it's just shoulds, we should all over ourselves, it's like I should do this, I should do this when it's really not what you're supposed to do. And that's why we're unmotivated, and unexcited. And so the the last two are really the most powerful. And actually what we work on first is C plan, aligned action, our recon and Kismat. Okay, and recon is the most transformational module that I have. That's where people that go through my program discover who they really are. So I have them go through a typing session with somebody that I work with, who is now my mentor. And so he has this his own typing methodology. And he will tell you what personality you were actually born with, because it's, it's genetic. And so we and he will tell you, if you're actually living in alignment to that, or if you're actually choosing another personality. So in other words, if you're misaligned, or out of alignment, as I will call it, so a lot of people will use that alignment when people don't know what it means. But it just basically showing up as your most authentic self that you can, because that is where you're going to get the most joy. And that's where you're going to connect to and understand what things you love. Because if we don't do that, we can set goals and we can build a plan. But if they're not goals that are aligned with who we really are, then they're never going to be fulfilling. So that's that so and Kismat is more about understanding, like Kismat is is fate. So it's kind of, you know, we go into the laws, the universal laws and there we go into, you know, manifestation we go into, like, just having this being steeped in belief that that you are here for a reason. And that there are things around you that are working in your favor, whether you know it or not, that, you know, we go, I have a process that I learned in neuro coaching that I take my students through. And it's a really how to rewire those, it's identifying those limiting beliefs and then turning them into

new thoughts that will serve that what you want to bring into your life. So yeah, so it's really, really great. It you know, the thing to my, my students not only transform, they transform their families, they transform the people around them, that because they are showing this this different person, this more more sparked person, and it's hard to describe, I love it. My students say, I don't know, I just can't, I'm just barked. So cute. Yeah. But like in and so they're like, you know, their husbands might say, hey, you know, can I have some of that, you know, their relationships get better. One of my students, like, she went on vacation with her kids and taught them what she's learned. And it was like the best vacation she said she ever had, you know, so it's, it's really goes much deeper than just helping one individual. And that's what I love about it. So yeah,

Christine Li  26:19  
that's beautiful. You describe it so beautifully. And I love how your system tackles the brain part and the heart part that both have to be considered for any spark to really be ignited and sustained. I think I have a feeling. And also, I love what you said a little while ago that if you're stuck within yourself, you have to decide for yourself, Where are you going to go to make yourself happier? What is the happier direction? And I love that, because that's something that we kind of know, on an intuitive level, to even if we're keeping ourselves away from that we know what's actually going to make us happier in the end.

Laurie Wright  27:01  
Yeah, yeah. And it's so many people that we have, we have women in particular, moms are very selfless, you know, and I have a lot of people who are just nurturers. So another thing that I've gotten certified and I take them through is their sparker types. And it's like learning what work they're supposed to do. So they learn their inborn personality. And then they also, once they, they know that they go through this assessment where it's like, there's 10 Different sparker types, and then there's a primary and a shadow. And so it's like, you know, going through this, and then it's like, when you know that and it's like, are you going to live up to your agreement? Are you going to like it? And once they really understand what they're all smart, right? But because they're nurturers, they have a tendency to? I can't I they think of it as being selfish, selfish versus self at self less. And so it's this conversation about, is it really, because if you're not showing up, in your best way possible, isn't that more selfish than, like, operating from an empty cup, where you're snapping at people and not living your best life? And the other? I like to use this too, because this is pretty powerful is like, how do you want your grandkids to remember you, because I do have a lot of grandparents. And that's one thing that drives me is that I never want my grandkids to see me as the stereotypical grandmother, you know, I don't want them to see me as old and not living from a place of purpose. You know, I want them to see me like high energy always contributing to the world. And I want them to know that that's what old age looks like for them. So something that they have to look forward to. Yeah,

Christine Li  28:55  
I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. You are inspiring. You seem like an amazing coach, you offer so much quality for people to sink into and to really explore what they're made of, no matter what their age is, I have a feeling that that your model would work for younger people, but you happen to be drawing and targeting an older crowd. Thank you for the work that you do. And thank you for coming on the show today. I'm so glad to hear

Laurie Wright  29:29  
a little shiny new this younger because my kids are probably like they're carrying around their own limiting beliefs because like I didn't have all this information back then. But oh, well. We'll work on our grandkids. So there'll be the like, have all this information. Yeah, but like you said

Christine Li  29:42  
each person affected is a bunch of people affected. So yes, let's keep doing the work. Thank you so much. Can you share with us how people can stay connected with you and find their way into your program?

Laurie Wright  29:55  
And then sure, yeah, anything? Yeah, sure. Thanks. Yeah. So I have a great quiz. So because you had asked if I have something and I was like, Oh my gosh, they could take the quiz. So I talked earlier on about the roles and the identities we play. So I created this quiz. And it's been really fun. I love it, because it really helps people identify where they are, and these different kinds of roles. And so it's called, you can find it at notyouraveragegrandma.com/quiz. Super simple. But yeah, you'll I think there's five or six types, and so you can find out and then when you get your results, then you'll those results will kind of like tell you what the best next step is, to kind of like get out of that the most of them are stuck roles. But there's the also the sparked soul is the kind of like, where you want to be. So some people test out is that so that's amazing if you do that. But yeah, so that's how you you can learn more about yourself and where you are and how you might be able to, you know, get get unstuck. Yeah, and then you can follow me on social media. I've been doing reels, and I kind of am very silly with my reels. I like to do the audio voices and stuff like that. So yeah, so if you want if you'd like silly, then you can follow me on Instagram, and I do put it on Facebook as well. So yeah,

Christine Li  31:15  
beautiful. I will repeat the link to get the quiz that Laurie has for you. That's notyouraveragegrandma.com/quiz. And please do follow Laurie stay in touch with her and spread the word about her great work. And thank you again, Laurie for Thanks. Thanks

Laurie Wright  31:33  
so much. I loved it. It was so much fun. I feel like like I was in flow. So it really works out good when when that happens.

Christine Li  31:40  
We've got this spark. Thank you so much. And thank you listener for being here. I really appreciate your time and your attention. I will see you next Thursday, when the next episode drops by. 

Thank you for listening to this episode of the Make Time for Success podcast. If you enjoyed what you've heard, you can subscribe to make sure you get notified of upcoming episodes. You can also visit our website maketimeforsuccesspodcast.com for past episodes, show notes and all the resources we mentioned on the show. Feel free to connect with me over on Instagram too. You can find me there under the name procrastination coach. Send me a DM and let me know what your thoughts are about the episodes you've been listening to. And let me know any topics that you might like me to talk about on the show. I'd love to hear all about how you're making time for success. We'll talk to you soon

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