Overcoming Lingering Issues: Real Stories and Solutions

Dr. Christine Li [00:00:00]:
Welcome back to the Make Time For Success podcast. I'm Dr. Christine Li, your host, and this is episode 211. Well, lo and behold, we've arrived at the end of yet another beautiful year. We will be waving goodbye to 2024 soon. But before December 31st comes knocking at our door, I wanted to help you with this episode. This episode contains content dealing with those things in your life that just seem to be lingering. Let's go listen to this episode together now. I think you're gonna benefit from the content.

Dr. Christine Li [00:00:44]:
Hi. I'm Dr. Christine Li, and I'm a psychologist and a procrastination coach. I've helped thousands of people move past and overwhelm so they could begin working to their potential. In this podcast, you're going to learn powerful strategies for getting your mind, body, and energy to work together so that you can focus on what's really important and accomplish the goals you want to achieve. When you start living within your full power, you're going to see how being productive can be easy and how you can create success on demand. Welcome to the make time for success podcast.

Dr. Christine Li [00:01:28]:
So we've come to the last episode of 2024, and I thought this would be a perfect time to talk about the things in our lives that we let linger. There is a huge backstory to this episode. I had recently come back from a business conference in Phoenix, and I came back feeling really inspired to take a hard look at how I was using all of my time. I was newly committed to spending much less time doing random social media scrolling, and I was also committed in a very real way to be more efficient and efficacious with my work time. So whatever time I was using for work, I wanted to double my output. I wanted to make my work time really that much more meaningful, and I brought this new idea of mine to clients of mine in the program that I call the success lab. The success lab is a weekly membership program. You can join at any time, and my members have become like family to me.

Dr. Christine Li [00:02:44]:
Since we meet every week, I get to know their personalities. I get to know their idiosyncrasies. I get to know their wins. I get to know how to help them, and we help each other week after week. And in our last session, we did talk about the things that were lingering, and my beautiful SuccessLab members got really excited that this content was going to be made into an episode. So we cocreated this content together. So a big shout out to my amazing SuccessLab members. Thank you for helping me with the podcast and with this last episode of the year.

Dr. Christine Li [00:03:25]:
So let's move on with the topic of what is lingering in your life. I want you to stop the recording just for a second, maybe a couple minutes, and write down a list of things that you can come up with without even thinking of things that are lingering in your life, the things that are unfinished, the things that are broken, the things that you keep meaning to do, the things that just don't seem to leave your to do list. I want you to make a list of at least 3 or 4 just because you're listening and just because you care to make time for success and you like the information that I share with you week after week on the podcast. Do this as a gift to yourself this holiday season and at the end of the year. Typically, at the end of the year, I have a history of making myself completely nuts because I, for many, many years, believed that if it was the end of the year, I needed to wrap up every single loose end that I had in my life, and I would then, year after year, make myself really frantic and frazzled and nervous that I wasn't going to meet the deadline of the new year. And a couple of years ago, I decided I was done with that year end habit because it was never bringing me a feeling of joy or celebration. It was actually just making me feel like I would never get to the end of my to do list. And as you know, if you've been listening to this show for any length of time, I don't feel there is an end to our to do list because they are always supposed to be replenished and replenishing.

Dr. Christine Li [00:05:14]:
So if you have a habit of making yourself nuts at the end of the year, this is your permission slip to relax this year, to say, you know what? It's the end of year. It is wintertime, at least in New York, and it is time for me to reflect and to relax and to enjoy these last days with myself, my loved ones, my furry animals, and with all the good things that have happened to me this year. So that's just a general message. But now onto the specific topic of what do I mean by the things that are lingering. I actually looked up the definition of a linger before I pressed record tonight, and the definition of linger is to stay in a place longer than necessary because of a reluctance to leave. I'll repeat that. It's to stay in a place longer than necessary because of a reluctance to leave. And when I read that definition, I just thought to myself, oh, it's just kind of being slower to act.

Dr. Christine Li [00:06:23]:
It's just feeling like you don't need to act with any urgency, and that, for me, made the difference, the difference between procrastinating on something and lingering on something. I believe that I have largely cured myself of procrastinating, which is the habit of just playing out denying that something exists, avoiding something even though you know it's really important or isn't important. It's just a blanket decision to avoid, and I feel like I don't do that anymore, and I'm very grateful to say that I've come this far in my healing journey around chronic procrastination. But the lingering stuff, I still do have, and that's what I realized when I came back from my business conference. And I wanna raise this concept with you as well in case there are multiple things lingering in your life that you really haven't given much thought to. And I thought the end of the year is as good a time as any to just bring these up because the lingering items might be some easy wins for you, some things that you can knock off your to do list that won't make you drained, that will still leave you some time to wrap presents and get together and make cookies and whatever you do for your traditions for the end of year, but knock some of these lingering items off your to do list for you. Give these items a finish line just for you so that you can create brain space for yourself so you don't have to bring these things into 2,025 and so you can start fresh. So you can start without anything lingering.

Dr. Christine Li [00:08:12]:
And I always think about the cranberry song, do you have to let it linger, which is such a catchy tune. Right? So, I wanted to share some stories from the SuccessLab conversation that I had this past week about the topic of lingering. I am not gonna use any names, and I'm not even gonna use any real specific examples, but I am gonna address some of the common themes. One of the themes was we let things linger because handling these things seem very daunting, and that makes sense. Right? Maybe you have a pile of books that you wanna sort through. Maybe you have years years of photos that need to get organized. Maybe you have multiple junk drawers. Whatever it is, it can feel like, well, it's not doing me any harm.

Dr. Christine Li [00:09:04]:
It's just laying there, but we all know that these things are irritants to us, and if you do have a wish to have these things organized, I would suggest just start with a kindness to yourself for having them be there and an idea that you're gonna just do 10 minutes at a time. Even if it's just one set of just a 10 minute start, even if you just do it once, that would still be a victory for you. I would say any junk drawer really only takes about 10 minutes to do, right, when you think about it. So allow yourself to no longer feel daunted by the task at hand. That is the first concept I wanted to share. The second concept is when lingering items linger because they're just not a priority for you. You've just gotten into the habit of walking by the thing in your house that is broken. So maybe it's a door handle for one of your kitchen cabinets.

Dr. Christine Li [00:10:08]:
Let's make that as an example. It might be chipped. It might be loose. It might be totally broken. Do yourself a favor and decide. You're gonna make that today's priority. Just because you listen to doctor Li on the show today, you're gonna decide, I'm gonna wipe this out of my mind for good by taking care of it. You're no longer gonna make it a no priority kind of item.

Dr. Christine Li [00:10:34]:
It's gonna be top priority for you today. The 3rd concept was a big theme in the group, and that was financial tasks. Financial tasks, as we all know, can be both big and small. It could be that one check from your client that you have that needs to get to the bank. It might be something that you had from your old job that you need to make some calls about so that you make sure your money and your funds are taken care of. We have these kinds of tasks periodically. These are things that will never totally be done with, but if you have some lingering and you find yourself worrying about them rather than getting on the phone about them, I would suggest today is a great day to leave a message for someone, to get on the phone with an agent, to ask ChattGPT what is your first step for dealing with x money issue, whatever money issue it is. And my experience is that people in the financial industry, they're more than willing to help because, typically, when they help someone, they have more of your money to manage.

Dr. Christine Li [00:11:53]:
So you can think of it as a win win that you get to have your lingering item taken care of, and your money gets to be more secure. And when money is secure, it grows. Okay? So that's that concept. Then another concept I wanted to talk about when it comes to lingering items is our feelings. Oftentimes, things linger because we've attached our feelings to these certain items. So it might be something you're doing for a family member. It might be something that you need to do for your own business, but you're either afraid or you're feeling resentful or you're feeling upset or you're feeling pessimistic. Any and all of those feelings could stop anyone from taking action and getting the ball rolling and getting the lingering item taken care of.

Dr. Christine Li [00:12:56]:
So I wanted to address that as a concept and category of its own because our feelings can really get in the way of so many different things, and they can keep tasks lingering on our to do list. Now decide for yourself. I'm just gonna look at my to do list today, and whatever's on there, whatever I can knock off by turning off my feelings for a few minutes, I'm gonna do that today. So that's like a side task. Just get rid of things that you're holding up because you have a certain feeling about them. Decide that your feelings are important in a certain way, but they're not that important that they should keep you blocked on this particular project. K? And then 2 more concepts. 1 is communication.

Dr. Christine Li [00:13:51]:
Communication, as you know, is one of my favorites go to items and skills that we all possess. I believe whenever we can use our skill of good, direct, honest, and timely communication, we win. Every time we communicate, things get better, typically. And when it comes to lingering items, sometimes, it just takes an email to someone. It just takes a basic, can you do me a favor kind of request to someone. It just is opening your mouth in a program like the Success Lab where you get help from other members. All it takes for you to get rid of the lingering item is to communicate. So if you need help with something, if you need to delegate something, if you need to change something in your life, use your communication skills and get rid of the lingering item.

Dr. Christine Li [00:14:49]:
The last concept that I have to share with you is the whole concept of making time for success. I mean, after all, that's the topic and name of this podcast, but are you making time for the things that are lingering? Sometimes, the only reason things are lingering is because we haven't made the time for ourselves. We're so busy taking care of other people. We're so busy taking care of our pets. We're so busy taking care of the holidays that we haven't set aside a good block of time to take care of the things that we need just for ourselves. So end of the year, just as good as time as any to start doing this new kind of self care where you carve out some time just to take care of things just for you. I hope you really enjoyed this episode on what is lingering. Remember, you don't have to let things linger anymore.

Dr. Christine Li [00:15:52]:
Knock off a few, and you're going to feel, wow. That was such a relief. I actually had one member come to me earlier this evening and say, that was such a relief. That session that we had in the success lab was such a relief, and she did the item that she had been letting linger, and she felt so much better. And, of course, she found that the whole solution to the issue was very easy after all. So spare yourself the worries. Spare yourself the time loss. Spare yourself the energy loss, and let's start celebrating.

Dr. Christine Li [00:16:28]:
It's the end of the year. Let's end on a really high note. I wanna send you all my love from this little studio in my home in New York, from this wonderful podcast that we share together, Make Time For Success. Let's head into the new year with joy, with freedom, with clarity of mind, openness of heart. I look forward to sharing so many more wonderful episodes and cons much more wonderful content with you next year. I can't wait for that to happen. If you want a refresh on the content of this episode and a worksheet for the lingering episode, go to maketimeforsuccesspodcast.com/linger. Again, it's maketimeforsuccesspodcast.com/linger.

Dr. Christine Li [00:17:20]:
And that's a wrap for this episode, this year, and let's celebrate all. We have so much to be grateful for. Take care. I'm grateful for you.

Dr. Christine Li [00:17:31]:
Bye. Thank you for listening to this episode of the Make Time For Success podcast. If you enjoyed what you heard, you can subscribe to make sure you get notified of upcoming episodes. You can also visit our website, maketimeforsuccesspodcast.com, for past episodes, show notes, and all the resources we mentioned on the show. Feel free to connect with me over on Instagram too. You can find me there under the name Procrastination Coach. Send me a DM and let me know what your thoughts are about the episodes you've been listening to. And let me know any topics you might like me to talk about on the show.

Dr. Christine Li [00:18:08]:
I'd love to hear all about how you're making time for success. Talk to you soon.